This Message Brought to You by the Number 1

18 June 2009

 

Dear Colt:

Buddy, today is equal parts amazing and ordinary. Exciting. Bittersweet. Overwhelming. And just plain wonderful.  Every day of the last year has meant growth for both of us. You have grown from the 6lb 6oz lump of love that I met at 3:06pm, June 18, 2008 into the 12-month-going-on-3-year-old live wire that you are today. And I have changed each day right along with you. I never knew there was a Mama inside of me. But you did.

 

You’ve slowed me down. And I didn’t even know I needed that. Overnight, you single-handedly reprioritized my life. I live for our evenings and weekends. My absolute favorite part of the day is 7:30 - when we rock and chat and you have your goodnight bottle in your jammies. I tickle your feet. You hold my hand. I let you trace my face with your chubby little fingers. Sometimes I hold you long after you’ve fallen asleep, just because I can. (And because you only sit still on my lap if you’re asleep...)

 

 

You have been here an entire year. Wow. A year ago tonight the three of us were in our hospital room, trying to figure out what to do with each other. Your Paw was trying his best to sleep, but you and I were up most of the night – just talking. I had no idea what the next year would hold for us – I was more focused on getting through each day. Each hour! And we did. We got through each hour and we got through each day. And then we started measuring time in weeks. Then months.  And now… years. This last year has meant lots of smiles, some frustration and tears, lots of your Paw and me watching you do something – then turning to each other with wide eyes and shrugged shoulders as if to say, “don’t look at me, I’ve never done this before either.”

  

I am so proud of our little family, and my heart just bursts when I try to wrap my head around all of the memories we have yet to make in this life.  But every day is special. The sleep-through-the-night days, the runny nose days, the swinging in the park days, the exceptionally wiggly and uncooperative days. Every one of them.  Sometimes we just sit and stare at you, laughing at the faces you make as you play or eat. You are a wonder. And though I cannot wait for the day I hear your sweet voice tell me you love me or the day you reach up and hold my hand when we walk, I am constantly reminded that life is short and I am enjoying everything as it is now. Every smile. Every mess.

Happy birthday, sweet boy. You have brought happiness and God-sent distraction to a family who needed it more than they realized. You are truly a gift.

Love Mama

Comments

[Jenni]

tearing up!

[Dad]

Well said, your mother and I always suspected there was a critter in there waiting to burst forth and blossom into a bundle of loving motherhood. :) Love to you all,

[Ross]

That's cute as hell.

No really, best blog post ever.

[Mom]

These are the best years......

Love, Mom

[Lori S]

Thanks for the tears.

[Teresa]

you made me cry. I love your little boy SO much (you aren't bad either) I hope it only gets better and better ....which it will :) and I agree with your friend--hands down best post ever!